I’ve turned a corner. I had some dark moments of questioning it all when I was sick. Viruses can do that, sickness affects the mind as well as the body. The stress of holding space for retreats- I had moments of questioning if it’s worth it. But these past few days seeing people come out of Nick Werber’s retreat, seeing Nick and his wife Jenn after his retreat, I know it’s worth it. This week having Christina Cross here for her retreat it all feels worth it. Talking to the people in her retreat, participating in an akashic records class with them today I feel in my bones the value of this work.
Retreats are like recharging stations. Those of us who came here from other places, those of us who signed up to do this work in this life, sometimes we get burnt out, sometimes we toast our nervous systems to a crisp because we do so much, we hold so much space for others. We said we wanted to burn through karmas in this lifetime and so we were born into whatever abusive, addictive, confusing home we were born into. We said we wanted to know God, goddess. And then we went hard into service. So when we come together into these sacred circles where we have met each other in lifetimes past we remember who we are. We reflect each other’s light and love. We discharge the excess unhelpful energies from our nervous systems and our bodies. And we recharge light, love and healing energy. We release anything that’s accumulated.
Doing this work in this sacred vortex of Mazunte is like a triple charging station/ initiation. Not only do we recharge but whatever real-life relationships or situations are out of alignment may get scrubbed out quickly. I tell people coming out of my retreats to not quit their job or break up with their partners for at least two weeks following a retreat. Because retreats shake us and sometimes then we want to shake off all the things that no longer fit us. I got shaken real hard this year. But you know what fell out when I went in to heal it? Fear, not just new fear but old fear from childhood as well. The new fears activated and held on to the old fears and they all shook out together. In the healing part of the shaking dance. That’s the second part. The first part is the Universe shaking us real hard and the second part is the self-healing shaking to shake out and off whatever’s come to the surface to be released.
It’s good to get shaken sometimes. We might never choose it intentionally but afterwards wow. Experience. All these human experiences. I felt that also today in looking back at my experience. That it was just an experience. We label things positive or negative but what happens when we just let it be an experience? Neither good nor bad. Just something that happened to move some other things.
I’m still processing it all. but feeling back in it. Back in the flow, back in the magic of Mazunte. Probably a little stronger and a little more flexible.
I love you all. I wish strength and flexibility for you all too. Health and happiness for all beings everywhere.
Lisa and Maha Rose